Tyrantasaurus, writer/angry lady
If you’re brave enough to venture out onto the great sea that is the Internet and write a review, make sure it’s going to be helpful. Make sure it’s going to be really, really helpful.
The only review I’ve managed to write on Amazon.com, however: not helpful. I talk about high school, which is never a good idea, and then I suggest smoking weed and watching a horror movie that nobody has ever heard of, not even my friend from high school who was in it.
Probably even less helpful is a woman, Margaret Feinberg, who reviewed her own book and pretended she was someone from her target market. Her review can be found at the bottom of this page. She pretends she’s recommending it to everyone she knows (because she needs the money), and even though she’s batting for herself, her review of her own work lackluster and robotic sounding. “Have/am”? WTF?
I bet she wrote all the other reviews that are authored by “A Reader.” Naturally, however, she gives herself five stars.
The least helpful thing that people do on Amazon.com reviews, though, is comment on the order instead of the item! Like this guy. Not only did he prove himself dumb as nails, it almost seems like he was more concerned that his copy of Satanic Verses was late than what it said, what he thought about it, etc. etc.
I’m sick of reading reviews like this:
“Amazon.com, I’ve got a bone to pick with you! My copy of Borat was FIVE DAYS LATE. You even got my address incorrectly when I typed it in to you and I had to get on the phone with UPS and straighten that mess out! By the time I got done crying about how my DVD hadn’t come and about the fact that you don’t have a customer service number, helloooo!!! I was way too exhausted to watch the movie. Thanks, but no thanks. One star.”
I was able to fictionalize someone who’s gotten their own address wrong when ordering something online, by the way, because I’ve done it. Twice.
Rantasaurus Says: The Satanic Verses showed up to my house on time and I still didn’t get it.
