Dear PigSty Neighbor,
For 6 years we’ve lived across the road from you. Your driveway amazed me then, with the amount of stuff piled along its edges, but now, GOOD GAWD! As I look out my window, I see a 30-foot-long row of wood that you’ve had covered with black plastic. There is an old 1950’s camper with a blue plastic tarp tied over the top, I guess to keep the rain out. There is a huge white plastic awning near the entry to your garage (which, through the windows, appears to be full of boxes of more crap).
Under the awning are tables and tables of crap, including 6 old computer monitors, broken kids’ toys, cardboard boxes, and dead plants in pots. People actually pull into your driveway, thinking there is a flea market taking place! It’s good that you put a sign out to let them know there is no sale.
Your van, which is slowly falling apart, is dented and missing a front and back wheel cover. Your son’s car (he weighs 450 pounds) shoots out blue smoke when he starts it. He peels out each time he backs out of your gravel driveway… shooting dust and gravel into the air, which of course, blows to my driveway.
Your front porch is completely full of crap, making it difficult to get to the door. Your side door, which is visible, too, is surrounded by cases and cases of empty Diet Pepsi cans, waiting to be returned for deposit. If you’d return the cans for 5 cents each, you’d probably have enough money to replace your missing wheel covers.
For 6 years I’ve watched the piles grow. I’ve watched the weeds on the edge of your driveway bolt and send seed all over my gardens.
I like you, neighbor, but I’m sick of your crap.
If this was in the UK, a complaining letter to the local Council would get them down on this guy like a ton of bricks, and they’d make him clean it up.
Can you notify your local authority, whatever it is? Maybe anonymously, since you say you like this neighbour?
Awesome, a rant with pictures.
I love picto-rants. If I were you, I’d wait until they left the house for the day, load up the empties and cash them in. If they ask about it, shrug and say “must be the eyesore tax I keep hearing about…”
YOUR SO RIGHT! The same is happening down our estate too! People just think they can dump their rubbish around your house oh and look at their house fronts and door steps all clean… Its so annoying our houses and estates are not where people can dump their rubbish! outside our house isn’t as bad as yours! these pictures look horrible and i think they should stop dumping garbage round your house right now!!!
Oh, man! Creative Freakin’ is soooooooo funny! Love your last line! Eyesore Tax! Har, har, har!!!
hi i enjoyed the read
Totally freakin’ awesome! I love the photos. PROOF! Good gawd who would have figured?